Deathworld Flora & Fauna ; Archon Subsector Gribblies

 Greetings all. As part of my plan to become a influencer and stop having to work for a living I've tried to pretty up my terrain. So here are some bits from Dungeons & Lasers Encounters kickstarter from a while back, along with some fanciful text to amuse, 

The Blue Sepsis Fungus

The Blue Sepsis Fungus, or BSF originates from the planet Encounters in the Sulka IX system in the Archon sub sector. It grows in the wooded areas of the huge forests on the main continent there and has little value, but two remarkable properties. Firstly, it's spores are of such a microscopic size that many of the original colonists died of a infection similar to sepsis with very little clue to how it occurred, the second notable property is it's incredible resilience to fungicides and other less sophisticated methods of extermination. BSF have even been unwittingly transported to other Imperial words from Encounters to such an extent that eight Imperial worlds have regular BSF culls and subsequent martyrdom barbecues after the events.

Two Imperial pest officers attempt to engage a mature BSF .

The Insano Nut

The Insano Nut is also from Encounters. They are large seeds that grow in abundance on the planet and have a highly palatable taste and high yields. The nutrients found in the nut can aid cognisance, concentration and have a mild anaesthetic effect aiding workers to continue labours up to 21% even after semi debilitating injuries. It can also benefit problem solving and cause a 6% increase in inquisitiveness. Despite these unwanted effects there is another reason the Insano Nut is not as popular as it could be; main problem with the Insano Nut is in a small percentage of the populace, it causes violent psychosis. Administratum figures for the occurance varies but figures estimate between 8% and 11%. This is not enough to cause a product ban but in most cases canned foodstuffs exported off world are required to have the following dislaimer ; WARNING: CONTAINS NUTS AND MAY CAUSE VIOLENT PSYCHOSIS AND/OR CURIOSITY. IN THE EVENT OF VIOLENCE CEASE CONSUMING . IF SYMPTOMS PERSIST CONSULT AN APOTHECARY.

Two Imperial pest officers attempt to apprehend an Insano Nut.

Devil's Cabbage

The Sulka IX system boasts several planets hosting dangerous xenos plantlife but on the 2nd moon of Encounters is the home of Devil's Cabbage. Or to be exact, research facility 71234, is where Xenobioligist Capsa Thunn decided to combine the dna of sand clams, catachan creeper fruit and terran iceberg lettuce. The somewhat inevitably predictable disaster led to the death of every person at the facility and an unhealthy infestation of this highly aggressive mobile vegitable. Of course the Imperium being what it is, and it's citizens, what they are, Devil's Cabbage managed to get off the moon and into several dozen ships headed for other Imperial worlds. So now we have cross pollination of these vicious face eating vegitables that by some horrible chance taste delicious pickled. There are even rumours of underground gambling dens where ambitious gluttons take on Devil's Cabbage in eat each other competions for large rewards. 

Pest officers attampt to bring down a Devil's Cabbage.

The Snappy Aloe

Another vicious inhabitant from Sulka IX is the Snappy Aloe. What was first found to be a large leafed plant with anaesthetic properties, with particular efficacy with regard to promethium burns. At approximately the same time as this discovery the Imperium discovered and immediatly went to war with a small humanoid xenos race called the K'Muk whose main method of waging war was the use for incendiary devices. So with minimal due diligence Snappy Aloe (or at that time mere Aloe Giganus) were swiftly exported to several systems to create plantations of these useful plants, stretching out for thousands of hectares. As the war dragged on more and more Aloe were planted and harvested. The K'Muk were eventually defeated and although useful the Aloe Giganus were deemed surplus to requirements and culled. This created a change in them. Xenobiologists have since discovered a latent psychic ability that meant all of the hundreds of millionss of Aloe felt the death throes of each plant, in their defence these alien flora sprout tendrils with a a strong beak like flower that has the ability to attack if provoked and this they did. The culling teams were systematically killed themselves as were any humans with similar genetic profiles. To this day there are dozens of outbreaks of Snappy Aloe attacks every Terran orbit, and on one planet - the once agri-world of New Abundance is now off limits to humanity until an anti plant crusade is mounted.

A reletively small Snappy Aloe about to attack.

Bullet Briars

Bullet briars are another plant from Encounters and is dangerous but not to the same extent of some of the other plants in this article. They are a prickly stemmed botanical that (like many alien plants) gave the impresssion of being benign due to their abundance of sweet fruit berries at their roots. The trouble with bullet briars is their thorns secrete a phytotoxin that is extremely painful, a pain so intense that it has been likened to being shot, hence the name. If untreated these toxins can cause agonising death but only in about 15% of cases. One interesting  consequence of this plant is Astra Militarum regiments from Encouters have a higher than normal pain tolerance due to the ubiquitous nature of bullet briars, thus making them ideal assault troops. This has been a source of great pride on the planet apart from the Encounterean 34th whose pain tolerances were deemed so high that they were classified as mutants (or worse) and liquidated. Bullet briars have since become a widely used hazard on Astra Militarum transports for the training of new recruits with only a few instances of them reaching planets to cause significant loss of life.

Two Bullet Briars about to be assaulted by Imperial pest control officers.

So that's all folks! Some vegitation to inhabit my jungles and forests with or without causing casualties in game.

Thanks for reading.

Regimental Standard and Warp Spiders

 Greetings all. Here's another one of those updates that may waste approximately 4 minutes of your time or slightly more if you read slowly. So on we go with the time wasting;

Current bearer of the banner is unlucky Chav Marbles. What he lacks in arm mobility he makes up for in enthusiasm.

Astra Militarum Reinforcements With Wings And Sharp Boots!

Greetings, just a quick update with regard to my Astra Militarum army getting a bit more fighty. Tempestus Aquilons to steal objectives from the unwary and Bullgryns to clog up the midboard with their resilience.

Aquilons

After playing in Shanecon 24 and not losing any games I was awarded these for being a bundle of joy at the event. Now they're painted up I hope to make Shane (and all my other regular opponents) regret it. I took the pics in direct sunlight in the attic so apologies for not waiting until dark.

 

Ready to drop down and give enemies of the Imperium hot laser death!

Bullgryns

These are an Etsy purchase, I bought them as I had been getting my arse handed to me in some boarding actions games with my Astra Militarum, but that ends now! T6 with 4++ and a fnp with damage reduction should put the cat amongst the Death Guard! I like these models as they look like Bullgryns that are on an Imperial Navy ship, and I can also proxy them for other things as they don't have any features. Money saved, as they can be Grotesques, huge mutants or even undisclosed aliens for some wacky homebrew Rogue Trader spectacular!

There is something fishy going on with these Bullgryn helmets, the sergeant has three eye holes!

And this sergeant has one! A cyclops or another Adeptus Munitorum cock up?

So that's all folks. Expect a battle report with me extolling the virtues of these units and saying how great they are or equally possibly I get them wiped out in short order and inevitably going looking for my next big strategic thing.

In any case thanks for reading!

Deathworld Flora & Fauna ; The Spiny Abberration

Greetings. The following is an intercepted transmission from famed xenobiologist Zarp Mekradol of the Rogue Trader fleet belonging to  Agusttil The Flamboyant, currently exploring the Mantic sub sector of the Eastern Fringe.

The Spiny Abberration

Since entering the sub sector several encounters were made with an enormous xenos species that we have yet to determine it's original homeworld. It is large, immensely strong and resilient. Possessing a rudimentary intellect allowing them to communicate and follow simple instructions. Our first encounter with one was during trade negotiations with a member of the semi-aquatic species called the Guldphish. The creature seemed to be acting as a bodyguard and posed a threatening sight during the proceedings. We had a squad of Catachan Jungle Fighters as our bodyguard whereas the Guldphish merely had the Abberration. When trade negotiations broke down the creature lunged at Agusttil when the xenos merchant showed agitation. Luckily, it swiped the head from a servitors head before attempting to attack the Rogue Trader. His teleportation device removed him from the scene and the Catachans exacted retribution on the trade delegation with grenades and lasguns. Sadly none but sergeant Croker barely survived the engagement and the Imperium is currently at war the the Guldphish empire.

The Big, The Bad, and The Abomination.

 

Greetings, or whatever. Some progress has been made and I now feel compelled to inflict it on you, the accidental reader. So without additional preamble, here is what I done lately.

Simple Jim

I bought some Etsy Ogryns a while back as I was tired of getting my Astra Militarum Army's lunch money stolen as soon as the close combat phase arrived. At the moment all I have done is a single Ogryn Bodyguard who had his first outing against a Necron Starshatter detachment whereby he was the last man down in the game (except for some sneaky Catachan weapons teams), so I am pretty happy with him. I have 9 left so I can (eventually) field two units of Bullgryns (6 and 3) or even 3 units of 3 if I'm feeling saucy! In any case for now he is the loyal protector of my as yet unnamed Cadian Castellan of the Aarjas Peacekeepers, my current AM crusade force. As I'm feeling expansive, this particular Ogryn was originally part of a voidship crew's anti-boarding response team and on occasion a space hulk expendable nuke delivery crew. Thus he wears a uniform more like Navy Breachers, than official Bullgryn troops. So hopefully he can soon be featuring in battle reports where he rips off tau legs and beats the rest of the team to death with the wet end.

Simple Jim, Bullgryn Extrodinaire!

The Battle of Salt Storm: Straken's First Hoo-rah!

Greetings. I have deceided to try to rekindle my batrep habit. The game was played a couple of weeks ago but storm Aowyn but a halt to that by tearing doen trees and leaving myself and many thousands of others in Ireland without power. So enough about real life, it's time to retreat into my fantasy world.

Inquisitor Jao of the Ordo Astartes was on the Imperial planet Almyrós tracking evidence of a full tactical squad of Adeptus Astartes that had apparently turned renegade and departed their chapter. They were from a Blood Angel successor chapter called The Blood Swillers. His spy network informed him that a sizeable force of Blood Angels, led by commander Dante himself had landed on the planet. He was then  sent a curt message to desist any attempts to track the renegades as it was effectively being taken over as a Blood Angel business. Jao then decided to meet and discus the matter with Dante in a settlement known as Salt Storm due to it's proximity to the vast sodium granule desert and subsequent regular weather phenomenon . In accordance with his elevated suspicion he commandeered a force of Astra Militarum as an escort and arrived to find the blood Angels arrayed for battle. Without waiting for the Astartes  to attack Jao gave Commander Straken the order to deploy and thus the Battle of Salt Storm began.

2025 Reinforcements

 Happy New Year! Just a quick update to show some models I finished last year but because of reasons I only got to put them up now. It's another ecclectic mix of gubbins but at least some of it will see table time this year, I promise.

Multicultural Weapons Team

Last year I finished a couple of weapons teams for the Astra Miltarum, here is the final member of team Shoot 'em up. Most notable thing about this team is it contains a Cadian and a Tallarn. Truly proof that the Guard is one big happy, xenos hating family.

Ready to put large calibre but nontheless not very armour piercing munitions into the enemy.

Wannabee Commissar

This Valhallan lieutenant has been painted up as a Commissar with slightly questionable tastes in a uniform. Perhaps he is from a world where ludicrous hats are a thing, or perhaps he comes from Miliner 8 a planet where everyone makes the most of customising their head gear. Perhaps he is just wearing it for a dare. Only he, and by extension, me, knows.

Braggs Vanglore Commissar Extrodinaire!

Ursakar Creed

I can now confirm Ursakar Creed did not actually die at the fall of Cadia, he simple scarpered. With the new Astra Militarum book round the corner he may see some table time as his own daughter, some sort of Oedepus Syndrome in reverse.

Creed shows everyone his thousand yard stare.

Next are two Cadians that missed last muster and have shown up pretending they were here all along. Not much to say about them but they probably went AWOL with Creed on the last shuttle leaving Cadia dressed as orphans.

Privates Shufty and Koggs.

Redemptionist Zealot

This chap is going to join an Inquisitorial Henchmen group as an Eviscerator is just what is required to uncover the truth about whatever Inquisitor is looking into at any specific time. He can also hang out with his other Redemptionist mates if he is ever back on Necromunda, with a hankering for burning heretics. Fun times.

Slobberchops the Mangler

The Problem With Humanity These Days

Is mutants. The one below is a couple of AdMech bits grafted to a Skaven Clansman (or Slave). He is armed with some sort of Radium weapon and a big engorged throat. He will probably feature in a battle whenever I get my Chaos Cultist Army's shit together.

Goiters Malone

The Cops

Finished this month as well is my Adeptus Arbites squad. Cracking models, but I'm hoping to create some improbable occurances where they arrest Chaos Primarchs or an Avatar of Khaine. Or even the Silent King, I'm easy.

Ready to restrain criminals with extreme prejudice and minor glee.

Shotpistol, Webber and Grenade Launcher dudes.

Gimp, Buffalo Bill and Sniper.

One Proctor and his Cyber Hound

So there you have it, the Imperium has been reinforced, and the enemies of mankind will quake with terror at the sight of these heroes. Or something,

Thanks for reading.