Slaughter at the field of screams.

The following is Scribes report of a vicious clash between Wood Elves & Ogres received from Heironimous Karsk, third son of Bludfeld Karsk Count of Soutberg.

As I traveled through southern Breton sampling many of the exquisite wines from the region, my companion and excellent guide, Paresseux Du Quorelle informed me that the peasants had spotted a large force of Ogres inside the outlying borders of the Forest of Loren. My guide then suggested we venture to the area to see if there would be any sport watching the secretive fey spirits of the woods repel these unwelcome invaders.
So accompanied by a mere 50 or so of my retainers and servants we sallied forth to search for entertainment. Barely half a days travel saw us on Le Plateau de Merde which I was reliably informed by Paresseux that in the local dialect meant The Hill of Nobility, and therefore an ideal place for us to make camp. It also gave us a fine view of the Ogre camp without getting close enough to smell them. Once an adequate supper was prepared my valet Jardis I retired to the pavilion for cognac & pipeweed.
I was awoken by Jardis informing me that an Elven host had been seen exiting the forest and now seemed intent on repelling the noisesome invaders. The Ogres formed themselves up into a semi orderly array, whilst the  Elven host disciplined ranks clustered around a large wood in the centre dozens of archers with arrows nocked, I also saw strange willowy maidens more akin to trees than elves mustering. A cluster of Fey riders with a wild look about them stood in the centre also. 
The Ogres were not so numerous but were many times louder. Huge hulking brutes, but more fearsome were three enormous Ogres riding even larger beasts (which I later found out were called Mournfangs), to my amazement I also saw an even bigger beast with a massive cannon strapped to it's back! Even larger than the Great Cannons of Nuln. 
While the elves were still arranging their battle lines three huge tusked hounds were released from the ogre lines whilst at the same time another 8 or so Ogres (these ones even more heavily armed the the rest) seemed to appear from the flank causing much consternation among the forest dwellers. A huge booming noise signified the ogre cannon's first shot where it struck a dryad but amazingly failed to harm it! The rest of the ogre force rumbled forward. From the elven lines two previously unnoticed eagles flew to attack. One engaging the flank of the massive cavalry, the other swooped upon a lone warhound type beast (which I later discovered was named a Sabretusk). The elven cavalry also engaged a Sabretusk. From the central woods a beam of shadow struck a unit of ogres, seeming to weaken them without causing any actual damage, barely a split second later flew a storm of arrows into the same unit slaying several of the smelly beasts.
The cavalry wounded the Sabretusk causing it to flee, they gave pursuit but failed to catch the elusive beast, the two eagles fared less fortunately both becoming embroiled in vicious combat. The ogre force then rumbled forward and another sabretusk charged into melee with the giant eagle battling his whelpmate. From the elves rear two misshaped brutes appeared. Then the Ogre cannon issued forth a projectile on the wood elf astride a giant eagle striking him squarely, with a flash of light the terrible energies of the cannonball was nullified. Both riderless eagles were slain by their enemies, blood and feathers crushed into the earth.
Things were looking bleak for the forest dwellers. The wood elf eagle rider (I later found out, only the mightiest of elven heroes ever rode to battle atop great eagles) flew into the flank of an oncoming ogre unit. The elven cavalry spurred their mounts into their enormous ogre counterparts, and two units of elven archers, turned on the spot, each one killing the ogre type creatures threatening their rear. The wood elf hero slew an ogre with ease forcing the entire group to flee, scrambling over a rocky outcrop that the brave elf was unwilling to traverse. Both units of cavalry were locked in bloody combat, though in truth from my vantage point the elves were suffering all the more.
The ogres to the elven flank (who seemed to have been singing the empire marching song 'she was only the fishmongers daughter') charged into the unit of tree spirits, virtually annihilated them and chased the survivors into the nearby woods. The wood elf cavalry were slain to an elf. A hitherto unseen unit of tattooed elves charged out of the woods to give battle to the ogres, slaying two but receiving grievous hurt themselves. The eagle rider flew over the battlefield aligning himself with a band of ogres that seemed to contain an ogre magic user. The battle was reaching it's pivotal point! 
The ogre force it had seemed reached their desired distance from their and charged en masse into the beleaguered elven lines. Two units of elven archers were pulped beyond recognition, as were the tattooed elves. The eaglerider flew to slay the ogre mage in single combat only to see him slink to the back of the unit, the thwarted elf wounded an ogre only to be crushed under an flurry of blows from ogre clubs. The last two remaining units of elves were butchered before nightfall. The singing (or to be more accurate the caterwauling that approximates ogre singing) went on long into the night. I thought it expedient to pack up camp before first light and return to less dangerous, and more civilised surroundings.

On the return journey my captain Siegfeldt Knauser discussed the battle and I informed him that the fragility of the elves were their downfall. Knauser was under the impression that the canny ogre general had lured the elves out by sending the Sabretusks ahead forcing the cavalry and eagles forward, whilst at the same time outflanking with the maneaters and gorgers. This he stated, gave the elves too many threats from too many angles, making their position far too vulnerable. Perhaps I need to find another captain as this one seems to have little grasp of the finer points of battlefield tactics and could prove a liability in my further travels.

  Heironimous Karsk, Junker of Soutberg.

Wardancers, more rats and a comatose Dwarf.

Progress!

So I've finally gotten some figures finished this year so I'll show them off. Firstly here is my Black Tree Design shadow elf. He's an elf in plate armour with an awful fringe. Just another of my started-fifteen-years-or-more-ago. I suppose he might make some sort of elf paladin in WHQ.

Black Tree Shadow Elf

More Rats!

Here are three more conscripts for the 50+ strong unit of Giant Rats for my skaven army. The one on the right is my all time favourite ratty model. I mean, you just can't beat a tiny little rat-centaur! Or is that rattaur? Centat?

Three mutated rats, see how they run!

Wardancers

These are some Gary Morley wood elves, that again have been on the painting table for nigh on 15 years. Not bad sculpts, but some incredibly fiddly detail on the belts and legs. Not to mention the figure on the right is definitely winner of Ludicrous Hairdo Award 2014, I mean, it only stays off the ground by his constant head twirling! I'm sure this particular elf spends an inordinate amount of time picking twigs, leaves & birdshit out of his tousled mane. 

Small-handed Wardancers

These four desperadoes are classic Wardancers from the 80's (I think so anyway). Lovely sculpts. They have all picked up extra weapons at the expense of defeated foes. I like to think of it as typical wood elf recycling. The elf on the left has stolen a sword from a chaos centaur, the elf second from the right has a Witch Elf blade and the tough guy on the far right has managed to defeat a halfling to 'borrow' his sword. looks like there is a minimum toll of at least one sword for any visitor to the forest.

Classic Wardancers

Below are two really, really nice models. Glam the laughing elf from the original Wood Elf Regiment  of Renown, and the Warhammer Quest Wardancer. Both bear blue warpaint (or talismanic tattoos, you pick) and lots of swords. Glam can either be my Wardancer hero or an Alter Noble, but I'm not sure if they will be available in the upcoming army book.

Glam the Laughing Elf & Warhammer Quest Wardancer

Glokni Worseforwear

I finished this dwarf casualty/drunk last night and I found it rather enjoyable. I originally thought he could only be used as a Warhammer Quest encounter, but since I've been perusing many battle reports, blogs and forums, it seems to me that he can just be plonked in a dwarf unit to make the numbers up, as well a provide some comic relief. He is also, to my knowledge the only dwarf in my collection with Pixie boots. It makes me want to pick up a few more inebriated fantasy models, but I'm trying very hard to not buy any more toy soldiers until I at least have another 100 painted. Lead addiction is a terrible affliction, and one that needs to be recognized, alongside flat feet and new romanticism.   

Drunk and/or dead Dwarf

Nice pixie boots

So there you have it, 14 models have turned from the dark side (black undercoat) to the rainbow side. Much to the anger of Sodje politicians I bet.

Getting back into 40K

Last week I had my first game of 40K. it was a 4 way free for all with 1000 points each of Imperial guard (me), Tau, chaos and Space marines. well I'm not going to give a battle report as I spent the first half of the game saying stuff like 'what?' and 'what does that do?'. Needless to say, Phil, the Marine player and 40K expert was extremely patient and made sure we all had a good time.
A couple of observations I have made since my last 40K outing (2nd Edition) is that armour in the 41st millennium has come a long way, Tau are bent, lasguns are pretty much the equivalent of stern talking too and Leman Russ battle tanks are my new favourite thing in the world!
Below is the single picture I took, as a rather unfriendly Iron Hands dreadnaught landed just outside my deployment zone who threatened  to do unpleasant things to my squishy guardsmen, but thanks to trooper Bolofski and his trusty meltagun, a thousand year old genetically enhanced superwarrior encased in tons of reinforced armour was reduced to molten slag! Result.

Trooper Bolofski melts a Dreadnaught

Having the game has inevitably made me want to get back to painting 40K models once again so now I'm in the process of seeing what viable forces I have. I think this time round my main area of focus will be Imperial Guard and Eldar. I have sizable collections of both but my painted Eldar army is limited. Very limited. below is in total my painted Eldar collection:

Fear the Xenos!

One Fire Dragon squad, a unit of rangers and fourteen guardians. I have some work to do with them. My Imperial Guard is far better off. I can field 2000 points comfortably but there is nothing in my armies devised after 2001. This blog will now hopefully be populated by my two mighty, if somewhat old fashioned 41st millennium forces.

Cultists or conscripts?

At least I'm sorted for weak assed human scumbags! 

The Succour of Le Hameau avec des Porcs (Wood Elves vs Skaven)

Elendil Pathkeeper strode into the temporary camp of the Kindred Of The Twilight Brook seeking his liege lord Silasal Skyslayer. Finding his quarry he quickly gave his report.
 'My Lord, I have found signs of a large Skaven force barely a halfday's march from the forest! Very close to the human village that we oftentimes trade pork and brandy.'
'To arms Kindred! Those foul rodents of chaos aren't getting their hands on my booze!'.
And thusly did the Succour of Le Hameau avec des Porcs begin.


I had my first game using the Vaticon Comp for my Wood Elves vs Skaven last week and it was the first time I got to use a Magic Lore that addressed some of the Wood Elves inherent weaknesses. I tried a few things that I don't really go for again Skaven and on the whole I was pretty happy with the results.

My army list consisted of:

Silasal Skyslayer' Highborn on Eagle with Sword of Might, Stone of the Crystal Mere, Dragonhelm, Charmed Shield, Annoyance of Netlings.

Cliath Carne The Skeinweaver' Level 4 Spellweaver (Shadow Magic) with Wand of the Wych Elm & Stone of Rebirth. Melkoth's Mystifying Miasma, The Enfeebling Foe, The Withering, Okkam's Mindrazor.

Gasaldriel the Noble, Army Standard Bearer with Armour of Fortune.

Kelthelmon Gladegrim,Wild Rider Noble with Dawnspear & Enchanted Shield.

Aeth Hawksight, Level 2 Glamourweave on elven steed with Power Stone. Wyssan's Wildform & Savage Beast of Horros.

Branchwraith

3 units of 8 Dryads

15 Glade Guard with the flaming banner

10 Glade Guard with standard & musician

2 units of 10 Glade Guard

8 Wardancers with Bladesinger & musician

8 Wild Riders with full command & Banner of Swiftness

2 Great Eagles

The skaven army consisted of a general on a warlitter (I really should build one of those), a Grey Seer on foot, Army standard bearer and a Plague Priest. There were five big units of at least 40+ betailed rodents, two were Clanrats, two were Slaves and the fifth was Plague monks. added to that was a Warp Lightning Cannon, a Doomwheel and a Hellpit Abomination. Three rat darts and two units of gutter runners made up the rest. Ninety three models vs approximately 233.  Not the ideal ratio, but then again, being outnumbered is something Elf armies are used to.

Wood Elf Deployment

Skaven Deployment

Deployment was pretty cagey, with me dropping both eagles on the flanks (the rat darts did likewise) I then placed my units to the left with Stuart starting around the hamlet & keeping a strong middle with presumably the intent of sweeping round my flank with the Doomwheel & Plague Monks. My plan was to occupy the buildings with the Dryads, destroy the high toughness units with hex's & buffs on my own units then to use the Wild Rider unit as a late game hammer.

Deployment

Turn One

I won the roll for first turn (essential for my shooting army!) and sent my eagles out to the flanks whilst advancing with my Dryads and getting the archers in decent firing positions. It's probably worth noting again that the rules pack I am using for a warm up to my upcoming tournament gives Wood Elves ASF special rule and access to all of the lores of magic. I took Shadow magic for my main caster as I thought it addressed many of the Wood Elf shortcomings, mainly how to deal with tough opponents, or high strength enemies. So in the magic phase I cast The Withering on the Hell Pit Abomination (as it was a one man rape show in my last game) to reduce it's toughness to a manageable level. I also cast Melkoth's Mystifying Miasma on the Doomwheel in an attempt to slow it down. I IFed the Withering (henceforth known as 'Die Rodent Die!') killing 5 Wardancers & putting a wound on my mage, at the same time taking -1 toughness from the Abomb. Also managed to cast Melkoth's Mystifying Miasma on the Doomwheel taking -1 from it's move. Shooting saw me kill the Abomb outright with approximately 36 shots and the flaming banner, and putting one wound on the Doomwheel, which went out of control. My turn ended with the feeling that the smoking mound of semi rotten rat offal couldn't hurt me this game. Result.

Wood Elf Turn 1

The Skaven turn started with a double rat dart charge on my left great Eagle and the other rat dart totally ignoring the one on the right. As the Doomwheel was moving very erratically, the Plague monks hung back so as not to start taking lightning bolts in their furry jacksies. Wither was cast on my Dryads in the largest building and the Warplightning cannon killed a couple when it shot at them. I was disappointed to find my Great Eagle couldn't stand up to two rat darts, doubly so when they killed it and overran pretty close to my large Glade Guard unit. Squatted Eagle aside things weren't looking too bad.

Skaven Turn 1

Turn Two

I managed a long charge with my Dryads into the Skavenslave unit with wet feet. I scooted round the other Slave unit with my eagle so I could line up some fun charges later in the game. I flew my Eagle rider to hide from the Warp Lightning Cannon and sounded a general advance. Cast The Withering on the Doomwheel but only reducing T by a mere -1 again. Shooting killed a few rats & the Glade Guard unit on the right caused another wound on the Doomwheel sending it out of control again! The Dryads layed some serious smackdown on the Slaves, and as they were halfway in the river, got no steadfast and no rank bonus. Unsurprisingly they fled. 

Wood Elf Turn 2

The Skaven army had two charges to declare, both left most rat darts charged the Glade Guard, but only one unit made it. I had completely forgotten about the Gutter Runners who appeared behind the Wild Riders. Curses! Magic saw the total lethality of Skaven magic when Plague killed a few Dryads then rebounded into a Clanrat unit killing well over 20 of them! To make matters worse for the unit the Grey Seer in it cast Wither with Irrisistible Force on my now toughness 2 Dryad unit in the building and fried half a dozen Clanrats. A few archers died to Warp Lightning, and to my horror the Gutter Runner units reduced my Wild Riders to three models! Close combat saw the rat dart seen off in short order fleeing virtually off table.

Skaven Turn 2

Turn Three

The Dryads charged the Warp Lightning Cannon, and my other combat unitsadvanced towards the main clanrat units. Due to the spectacularly lethal display from the gutter runners I gave them a few volleys of close range Elven arrows that  routed both units. The Dryads unsurprisingly killed the cannon crew and reformed (only not shown in the map - Drat!).

Wood Elf turn 3

The Skaven General charged out of his unit into the eagle rider and due to the exhausting backwards & forwards tactic employed by the Doomwheel driver the poor shagged out rats powering it hardly moved at all, which kept the Plague Monks stationary rather than have an out of control war machine run them over.  The Plague Priest miscast Bless With Filth rendering him a now, non magic user. Combat between the two generals was drawn.

Skaven turn 3

Turn Four

I charged my Glade Guard unit nearest the rat dart into them to avoid getting charged by the larger slave unit. I think around this time the dice gods thought that now I had no magical resistance, they wouldn't give me very many magic dice to clease the forest with! I advanced all my units towards the enemy and tragically split my fire resulting in panicking the Clanrats unit but not managing to damage the biggest threat (Doomwheel). The combat between the generals continued. The Glade Guard routed the rat dart (unsurprisingly) and overran to relative safety.

Wood Elf Turn 4

The skaven advance (sort of) continued on the flank and the Doomwheel wheeled round to splat and/or Zzzzaapp some Dryads. A couple of forest spirits were duly toasted. The skaven general finally failed his break test and I pursued, killing him and hitting the Clanrat unit in the flank.

Skaven Turn 4

Turn Five

I charged the Great Eagle and Dryads into the Clanrats in the hope that the steadfast could be removed (a long shot I know) in one turn, enabling me to out outmaneuver (sp?!) the filthy Plague Monks. I reduced the movement of the Doomwheel slightly with  Melkoth's Mystifying Miasma and sent a unit of Dryads out as bait for it (and hopefully stop it from getting involved in combat with my flying circus. Shooting killed a few slaves and that was about it. I think I won combat by well over 10 but steadfast spoiled the party!

Wood Elf Turn 5

The skaven turn saw the Plague monks line up for a charge and the Doomwheel destroy the unit of Dryads. The Clanrat unit broke, and was killed in the subsequent pursuit by the eagle squadron. I left the single Dryad and Branchwraith there as insurance against warp lightning and such.

Skaven Turn 5

Turn Six

Turn six was a wind down turn,where I left a little bit of bait for the skaven to ensure my more important (expensive) unit didn't give a bagfull of VPs at the end. The only thing I left in charge range were a couple of Dryads. Magic and shooting failed to cause much damage so I was in my happy place for the last turn.

Wood Elf Turn 6

The plague monks charged the Dryads whilst the Skavenslave unit charged the Wardancers in the wood. The Doomwheel advanced & shot a few from the other unit. Close combat saw 2 Dryads die and the Wardancers stay in combat with the slaves due to skirmishers being steadfast in woods.

End result, a solid victory for the wood elves and a big shiny endorsement for Shadow magic!

Skaven Turn 6

Below are a few pictures from the game.

Turn 2

The incredibly uncontrollable Doomwheel

Shoot Kurnous dammit!

Sneaky feckers!

it's amazing how messy a table gets

Isometric view?

Die skaven die!

Classy biscuits!

And a ratty New Year

Just a quick entry to record my final painting spurt of the year and amazingly (for me anyway) to get over a hundred figures painted this year!

Clanrats! Eeek!

 First up, I painted two clanrats for my Screaming Bell unit. Yes two is a crappy number but it is merely to bring the unit size up to 39 (a multiple of 13) so it is finished for small gaming purposes. Of course the unit will need at least another 13 members but that's for another year.

The Septic Musk Gland

 Here are some of my newly finished Plague Monks, with painted banner. I was trying to come up with a cool name for them, to adequately put the fear of the Horned Rat into their enemies whilst instilling pride and not-running-awayness into those around them. Unfortunately I couldn't think of anything like that so my Plague Monks unit is now called The Septic Musk Gland.

More Septic Glands

Here are some more of the unit, including three monks who are so proud of their ailments that they have made little scrolls advertising the fact, so in order are Tail Pox, Pink Eye and Nose Rot. Plus friends.

Rats, rats, wonderful rats!

Lastly here are 38 giant rats. Giants Rats don't seem to get much love according to the internet, but I'm a big fan. About 18 of the above figures are 90's purchases that have seen extensive combat action and as a reward received some rebasing and touch ups. The newer ones are all pretty much battlefield virgins, and hopefully I can change that in the new year.


So anyhoo Happy New Year and may you exploit all your opponents weaknesses whilst rolling average dice!

Painted up for Christmas!

The glacial pace of my painting continues unabated but I have something to offer today. As I've noted before, I paint more when I'm playing so I've gotten, if not a shitload, a definite shitlittle of figures finished.
Behold!

First up are a unit of wood Elf archers, not sure if it's the figures or the gradual deterioration of my eyesight but those eyes were hellishly hard to do.

Squinty eyed wood Elf archers

This figure comes from my undercoated for more than a decade pile. She (?) will be going into my Empire army to create the impression that some armies in the Warhammer world are equal opportunities employers. Is it me or does she look like Wallace in drag?

Huge Helga

This is a Black Tree designs halfling and like so many of my figures has spent a long time dormant, waiting for some paint love. I quite like this model although if you look at the base of his bow you will see a tiny skull. This has, in my opinion given the model a very sinister appearance as it is too small for even a human baby skull, so it has to be a baby halfling skull. As it is casually discarded at the foot of the archer, I can only surmise that this model is actually a halfling serial killer, and therefore not fighting for the forces of order, but rather a sadistic murderous evil little guy eaten up by hate and height issues. Not a very nice chap at all.

Rob the Halfling Hood

As part of my Chaos army these very old hounds add some very much needed chaff for opponents arrows to collect keeping my Chaos Warriors intact just before they rend the opposition limb from limb.

Raargh! Chaos hounds

 Finally, here is my Wood Elf hero on his Great Eagle of Doom. This is one of my first picks when writing an army list as his mobility and all round fighting ability has pulled quite a few victories from the jaws of defeat.

Death from the skies

Squawk!

 So there you have it. My army(s) have expanded by 19 painted models whilst my unpainted pile has decreased by the same amount. Time for a congratulatory biscuit I think.

Hellpit Abomination & Chaos Spawn WIP

 

Just thought I'd put up a couple of pictures of my Hellpit Abomination & Chaos Spawn conversions for your amusement.

Ermintrude the Abomination is a wire framed nightmare of green stuff and bits from my bits box. I vowed to myself not to cave and buy an Abomb so I decided to make my own (thus saving €57). So far all she's cost me is €13 for green stuff and probably 5 hours of blood, sweat and invocations to the Horned Rat! It's coming along nicely. The observant will notice the plastic Tyranid legs and the back end of an old Ork warbike. It's covered, sort of with patches of fur and assorted boils, warts, sores and carbuncles. Id hope to get her finished by the end of the year.  

Ermintrude the Abomb

the other side of Ermintrude

My chaos spawn is a 20 year work in progress which is gradually coming to an end with my newfound competence with modelling. It wasn't actually started by me but my nephew who chopped up two metal centaurs, added two halves of a plastic warhouse to get the body of this many hooved monstrosity. Features on this model include : two huge tongues , tentacles, hairy appendages, many teeth & a puckered starfish. Another 1-2 hours and this will also be ready for painting.

The nine legged terror of chaos

Those ball like objects are eyes